This is my final week at the Star Tribune, and is suppose to be the big Republican hoopla of the RNC. With much planning, security (oh the security), and money it seems the whole event may be a bit a small in scope. Today was my first day being at a convention, and on my first day I covered the press conference all but canceling the first day of events due to the hurricane heading toward New Orleans and the gulf coast. 

As I was standing in the back of the room with a video camera, trying to fit in amongst the television cameras, I looked up to the front of the room at the still photographers and almost started crying, I miss still photography. I really do. 

I love multimedia, I love film, I’m okay with video, and I miss moment of the still image. The quiet. I miss staring at one frame for as long as I want. I simply miss it.

At one point not long ago I kept a journal, writing almost daily, then I did “F is for Failure” in which I recorded myself reading my entire journal, using parts of it in the final piece for all to hear. After that keeping a journal slowly stopped and now it sits next to bed collecting dust while my mind writes entries that are never remembered or shared. 

So I’ll try blogging a bit here and there and see what happens. 

I’ve been in Minnesota since mid-June and it has been a interesting and strange being back again. I remember standing on the football field during my high school graduation not understanding why people were sad about leaving high school and Forest Lake, I said to myself, “Welcome to the rest of your life.” It took me another 3 1/2 years to finish college before I left Minnesota the first time. I returned three years later almost to the day, with mixed emotions. When I left again for grad school I swore only one thing would get me to come back again, an internship at the Star Tribune. And wouldn’t ya know it three weeks from graduation Peter Koeleman called and offered me the summer internship, I couldn’t believe I was coming back again. 

I’m living in Minneapolis with family so really this return to MN has been more like moving to a new place. I’ve never lived in Minneapolis before and it has made Forest Lake and the north suburbs seem so far away. At once I feel like a Minnesotan and an outsider, it’s familiar and foreign every day; I feel as though my feet are standing in two different places. 

A few things happened this last week that have made me ponder the last decade of my life and ask myself, “Have I grown, have I changed, am I maturing and moving forward? Or am I stuck in the same whorl pool of my college-age self?”

While on a quick surface level look one might say not so much: I am still single, no children, living in Minnesota and unemployed. Just like I was at 19. However, moving beyond material and marital status I’d have to say I have grown, a lot. While I still struggle with confidence, I no longer hide. I’m still shy, but no longer painfully so. 

I once asked Bob why he never moved to Italy, since he loves being there so much, he said because he matter how long he would live there he would never be home. It’s been interesting to reflect back after being away and to learn more about this state that has always felt like home.

A request has been made for a blog entry, so enter I shall. 

I’ve been interning at the Star Tribune in lovely Minneapolis, MN this summer. Doing lots of video and learning what a daily news grind is all about. There have been good days, and not as good days. But on August 11th I had a great day. That day I got to go to a Twins/Yankees game with Tribune staff photographer Jeff Wheeler! He let me tag along and talk, and talk, and talk about baseball.

The evening started off with me trying to get my excitement out without Jeff figuring out this was going to be like meeting the Beatles. My attempt at that lasted about 5 seconds before I was reminded I was not allowed to talk to the players, and that Jeff Wheeler is rather cool, calm and collected guy so I should probably tone it down a bit before he changed his mind.

We got to the dome and I tried my best to look like I knew what I was doing and to not get in Jeff’s way, not sure how well I did on that, but boy was I loving every minute of being there, we walked right by Derek Jeter!

During the game Derek looked at me twice! That’s 100% more times than once, don’t ya know?! I followed the rules and didn’t say hi, but it was hard to hold back. Jeter went 0-4 on the night, but looked good doing it. The Twins won the game and the yankees left the dugout all sad, leaving behind some unopened bubble gum that Jeff picked up for me as a souvenir of my first Twins game. He scored a pieces from the Twins dugout as well! If you want the inside information on what brand of bubble gum the Yankees and Twins use you’ll have to ask.

Looking at Wheeler’s photos after the game it’s clear sports photography may not be in my future, but being a baseball fan surly is. 

I’ve been on many other assignments this summer from happy to tragic, but my one night at the Dome with Jeff is down right my most favorite night of the entire summer! Thanks Jeff for bringing me along, hope you weren’t to embarrassed by my excitement

Recently I finished my final photography graduate class, magazine. I spent 10 weeks creating an online magazine prototype focused on music in New Orleans. Over the 10 weeks I worked as a managing editor, editor, photographer, designer, photo editor and whatever other title needed to be filled to get an online magazine built and running.  

I can honestly say it was the hardest 10 weeks of my graduate career. I ended up being sick over almost a month, during which all my shoot dates fell. Taking on the different roles one right after another was daunting and at times confusing. The biggest obstacle to overcome were the highs and lows of the shoot, rebounding after a story or plan fell through. I did a lot of rebounding, some more successfully than others. In the end, after all the struggle and hard work I am glad it is behind me and sad my days as of being in class with my fellow grads has ended.   

The final site can be found at www.kineticmusings.com/dim7 

In October I went to the Mountain Workshops in Danville, Kentucky. Their site went up this week with everyone’s work.  

Over five days I worked on a story about dairy farmer Brenda Croshaw. Brenda and her husband David have been raising and milking show cows for seven years. While I there one of their cows gave birth to a heifer calf, and Brenda was so pleased I was there to film the birth she named it after me. Baby Meagan was born at 12:30am October 18th weighing around 65lbs and the expect her to be sold this spring for around $6,000 as a show cow.This was my first time combining audio, still photography and video into one piece. My coach at the workshops was Colin Mulvany and I am very thankful for his guidance and editing advice while I worked on this story.

As I was backing up my files and editing I found this, the very first video I ever shot and cut. I had some technical difficulties while shooting and ended up with very limited audio, basically what you hear in the video is the audio I had. So not only was it a lesson in shooting video and cutting a video it was also a lesson in working around problems.

During homecoming at Ohio University I met Gay Hammon class of 1987, member of the Marching 110 Alumni Band. Gay was the second woman on to play cymbals for the Marching 110 in 1986. Woman were banned from the marching band 1963 when the band became the Marching Men of Ohio and adapted the high energy performance style still used today. The alumni of the 110 return every year to march in the parade and play during half time. Gay comes every year and has a lot of energy, case in point, she runs marathons because they’re fun don’t ya know.

Here’s the audio slideshow I put together from the day and I promise Joe Weiss it’ll be my last, “My name is…”

The College Photographer of the Year awards were judged this week, and my multimedia piece, “F is for Failure” received an award of excellence in the Individual Still Image/Audio Story or Essay category. You can view the video either on the video page on my blog or on the CPOY site.

The judges commented that it is the way multimedia photojournalism is headed and it reminded them of a “This American Life” story. You can watch a video of the entire category judging here.

I am thankful to have a piece recognized and am encouraged to produce and learn more. Before the judging began I thought about where I was, and who I was only a year ago: I couldn’t take a good photo to save my life, I had no idea how to record audio, I had only once picked up a video camera, I had never launched Final Cut Pro only watched someone use it, and I really was lost on how to tell a story.

And now twelve months later I am growing in my still photography and video skills, can record audio with easy and am branching into using multiple mics, have not only learned much on Final Cut Pro but have started to learn the Film editing program Avid, my story telling ability is starting to match my creativity and imagination, and most importantly I am slowly starting to believe that everything I’ve dreamed of doing might be possible. And really that’s the most important to have learned, and something I try to remember each day.

I would have never created “F is for Failure” without the help, encouragement, and kick in the pants from Bruce Strong, Chad Stevens, and Bob Sacha. Thank you for all that you have taught me and don’t be shy about teaching me more.

And yes, I do still fear failure, but since making that video I have had some experiences that stand as anchors of success. Each of us will always remember our failures more clearly than our successes, but in the words of Bob Dylan:
“There’s no success like failure, and failure is no success at all.”

Some of my fellow graduate students also received awards in CPOY:
Travis Dove was named College Photographer of the Year, Sports Feature, Portrait, Documentary, Pictorial
Luis Gilberto Santos, Pictorial
Tim Gruber, Domestic Picture Story, Individual Still/Audio Story or Essay, Video Story, Portrait
Jenn Ackerman, Domestic Picture Story, Feature, General News
Kainaz Amaria, Documentary
Chris Kelleher, Individual Still/Audio Story or Essay

Love to you all, congratulations.

Last Monday I spent the morning helping a first year film grad student shoot a film. Though I played a small part for a short time I enjoyed being on set, I was reminded of my love for film making.

The film makers name if ben pascoe, thanks ben for allowing me on set.

Last spring for a video class I created a short film about doors. My fellow classmates and VisCom grads were not, shall we say, excited, that might be the right word. Or maybe receptive? Okay, bluntly, they didn’t really “like” it. I walked away and thought, “Oh well, saw that comin’.” But then the plot thickens, (start scary music now). On a warm fall evening I journeyed to the other side of campus. I crossed Union Street, then climbed to the top floor of Lindley Hall. It was there that I encountered a new breed of people, Film Makers (music reaches a crescendo, pan across faces of film graduate students, music softens and quiets). I pulled my laptop from my shoulder bag, fired up Quicktime and hit the spacebar with a calm resolve. As the film played the audience grew, when the doors made their final close I was told, “That was really cool, can we watch it again?” I sat back in my chair and began to understand: when it comes to me, sometimes I need to cross Union.

And so, the world premiere of “Doors”